HEALING......FRIEND!

She's beautiful! She's lovely! She takes your breath away! That Nku cream advert could have been made for her ( I suspect it was!). Yes, she truly is a beautiful person. 

I forget exactly when I became aware of her friendship but the one thing I do not forget is our shared history. In secondary school, back in the day, those who did not know me well, assumed I am gutsy, those who do, know its all photo tricks to keep everyone at  arms length. I was so mouthy and reclusive at the same time, a bag of contradictions (as I still am today!). 

I remember being one of the few who felt no need or saw it as unnecessary, the need to pair up on the long walk from our dormitories to the dinning hall. I walked alone (is that against any rule?). I enjoyed my solitude and many times, someone would approach to save me from that walk of shame (apparently, that was what it meant to walk alone! I was blissfully unaware!). 

Anyway, some of that changed when we became seniors (which we were for 2years, being the guinea-pig set for 6-3-3-4,@#$%#@). At that time, it was time to pick someone you could stand and move into a cubicle with, away from the large dormitory and we paired up (can you say paired up if there's 3 of you?) Anyway, we ended up together, 3 of us. Me, Nwando Olisa and Wahir Wudiri (spoke with her for the first time since 1988, this past weekend!it was highly emotional for us both!).

Nwando Mary Olisa or Tata as she is more commonly known, is me. I have no qualms about saying this. I have found that we are so similar, its uncanny. At the time we were in secondary school, I wondered at some of the things we got up to and shook my head at how without issues we both were and fast forward to some years after when we met up at the University of Ibadan, she, there to do a Masters' programme after dumping secondary school following an unfortunate incident which I will get to later and me in the final year of my journey to acquire a Vet Medicine degree, we blended like we had never been apart.

In secondary school, we were girls who just wanted to have fun but were unaware we infuriated some for this. We got suspended and every time I have told the story of my innocence, I wondered if it were true because I was mostly disbelieved. She helped to put paid to that this past weekend, even naming those who ganged up to 'frame' us. I came back when we were recalled (without apologies for one term suspension for believing the wrong sort-we were profiled and sentenced, no trial!). She took the bull by the horn, and took the GCE exam, passed and went straight to University from that point!

When I say she is me and I am her, please note these distinctions, she is athletic, I am not, she is very pretty, abeg, leave me, she is very funny, I am morbidly funny (if such a category of humor exists!), she is Igbo, I am Yoruba, she is American, I am Nigerian, she is artsy(I honestly thought I would come to America to view her art works at The Smithsonian or some other Art-sounding place, I am in constant denial of what art I do know (ask my students, I cant draw to save my own life!). She studied art subjects, I went with science subjects cos of laziness. 

Yet we are one person, in outlook, in ideas, in beliefs and so much more. She flew in from Maryland to be with me for the weekend, after asking to come be with me when Mumsie passed and I said No! I didn't want to spend my time of renewal with her in sorrow, and was comfortable enough to say so. It was such a blast.

We just wanted to be together, and talk and be together and talk. it was such a fulfilling time for me. I have never felt more rejuvenated by an experience. It seemed like my mind which shut out all of my secondary school time because of the associated pain, opened up, spewed out its bitterness (which I was not even aware of) and healed!

Every woman needs one such experience in a lifetime, I think and this is just my way of saying Thank you to my friend for sharing this experience with me. I am so looking forward to the many other times we will have, doing this over and over again! Girl, you rock!!!