My life,My rules,My choice!

Trying to write has become a chore. Not because I do not wish to write but because I am being censored. This is the danger that everyone who writes has to endure and my neophyte writing persona is rebelling. I want to write with abandon as I have been encouraged by my writer friends but they dont know about my limitations. They dont know I am being watched.

The size of my ego intrudes on my ability to write and feel nothing. I am however my own greatest critic, this is because I know me best,contrary to what anyone may think. I know how many of me there are and how some actually carry some of me in their minds and so feel something akin to doppelganger-ish when our paths cross or lives touch but they are not me, I am.

I want very badly to write about you but words fail me....I used to be able to write about you, now I am more cautious. No one knows me like you do and still we make a muddle and when I want to, I switch it off and you lose your mind and make me laugh. Only its not funny anymore, we are grown and I am writing again....

Evil evil man, want me to miss my way when nothing in me can accomplish this real time thing you are good at. Kindred spirit who writes and writes and uses words that I simplify when I read so I can be assured I am literate. Kindhearted man and unschooled in dangerous waters he murks about in, fallen for angel of the dark masquerading as light. The trinity who keep me and save me and are blissfully unaware.

I am writing this one for me because its time to lift the lid and celebrate me as I want to, deserve to. Only big G knows what I am on about, my lover extraordinaire, non compare. 

Family, friends, acquaintances and yes! enemies, Adenike writes not for you but for me, she has an audience of one. Her thoughts and words make up for her inaction. When you need to know and she wont say, invest the time, ask me, I know her and can show you. What do you want to know and why. She is exhibitionist and minimalist but only I know which is which. Only I can sift the substance from chaff. Ask me.

Convoluted, tortuous but open mind and an oversized ego that religion almost smothered. Quirky, cheeky and free spirit that tradition stifled till rebellion rescued. Pain has set free and age has made wiser. The creed by which she lives is hers, under big G. That is why this is so true and so right. My life, my rules, my choice!